February 6, 2009
When was the last time Gwyneth absolutely stunned you? There was the baby pink Ralph Lauren dress that she won her Oscar in that some critiqued for the loose bust, but was otherwise perfect for a new breed of red carpet princess. Then there were some sparkly Versace and classic Calvin sheaths that she paired with smoky eyes and pale lips. She was fashion’s darling, gracing covers of Vogue and coveted by girls everywhere. So how did she go from the creme of the crop to her online debacle, GOOP?
There was a glimmer of hope when she hit the Ironman premiere circuit with the tiniest Balmain dresses and sky-high heels. Those long legs were back, albeit with a healthy dose of mommy-sexy. Then she teamed with Mario Batali for a Spanish foodie show. We love her on screen and on the red carpet, but as we have painfully discovered by postings on gift ideas for $1850 Hermes watches, we don’t love her online. With Gwyneth’s now infamous personal website, GOOP, she is now exposed to public reckoning as so many online “stars” purposefully are.
Oh but Gwynnie, don’t you know these online stars document themselves because they aren’t stars in their day-to-day lives? Online is their chance, their go at making their lives like a celebrity. Whereas other A-listers, like Angelina Jolie or Nicole Kidman, are chased by the spotlight and the public’s voyeur instincts, you, Gwynnie, have gone the other way and given it to us for free.
You tell us in your la-la land of privileges what to read from intellectuals such as Christy Turlington and Madonna and what to buy, from Chanel minidresses to Giuseppe Zanotti shoes, and you tell us your uniform consists of The Row tank tops and Tod’s cashmere trench. Darling, do you even pay for these things?
In response, you’ve said “F**k the haters!” to Elle UK, but we’re not hating. We’re just flabbergasted that you would willingly put yourself out like this, modeling your own recommendations and dishing out advice like dining out at Babbo, Otto and everywhere else in the Batali empire to our poor laid-off souls.
Admittedly, the media is harsh, and perhaps you thought you could just turn the media your way by controlling it, but stick to the screen honey, where your lines are edited for you by similar writers to those who might be doing online posting like you, but infinitely better.
Alas, if you’re hellbent on GOOPing, then take advice from Jennifer Love Hewitt and Britney Spears who have made their websites into personal love fests. But if J.Love and Britney are now your role models, isn’t it evidence enough to stop with the GOOP?